If The Orioles Were A Tragedy, What Kind of Tragedy Would They Be?

Choose your own metaphor for the 2007 season

By Christopher Heun

Yesterday’s dramatic 12th-inning win aside (a game they had won in the 8th but promptly gave away, necessitating extra innings), the Orioles’ 2007 season has been rough.

But just how rough has it been? In many respects, pretty much exactly like the preceding nine losing seasons. Which is pretty rough. At 64-84 with 14 games to go, they look like a good bet to lose 90 games for the fifth time in seven years.

In order to describe this losing streak more accurately, we offer a multiple choice quiz:

The 2007 Orioles season has been like:

a) A train wreck
b) A car wreck
c) A yard sale promising pleasant surprises but really only offers discarded crap
d) A train and a car wrecked together
e) A shipwreck, but instead of real pirate booty buried in the depths there’s only rusted hulks of old cars and Danys Baez’s torn elbow ligaments
f) All of the above
g) b, c and e but not a or d
h) A nightmare you’ve had 10 years in a row